4 Steps to Feeling Better About Yourself

April 4, 2017

We are all victims of self-doubt. Whether it’s a rough patch, a bad day, a major failure, it seems like if one thing goes wrong, we become so good at focusing on the negative instead of trying to learn from our mistakes and move on.

You don’t have to be strong all of the time.

It’s okay to admit that you are not okay.

Feel good

This is something that I’ve struggled with in the past but I’ve learned to focus on the positive rather than worrying about the negative.

Take time for yourself to learn and to grow into the person that you long to be. If you’re always complaining, try being thankful for what you have every day. Don’t worry about what everyone else is doing and remember that we all know what it’s like to “not be okay”.

Inspire Yourself

Whenever I’m feeling uninspired, I get paralyzed with self-doubt and it prevents me from doing the things that make me happy. The more you resist facing the problems and trying to overcome them, the harder it will be to focus on what can make you happy and inspire a healthier lifestyle. If you’re feeling stuck in your current situation at work, school, or life in general, it would help if you started making some changes so that you can start being happy. I used to work at a call centre and it was suffocating me in terms of not being able to think creatively and to do what I love. I no longer work there and have found that my attitude has gone from complaining and being unhappy with what I did for a living to a happier and positive attitude because I decided to pursue my passions and most importantly, make that change.

It is sometimes quite difficult to find a source of inspiration especially when we are already feeling down. If you’re going through this, take an hour each day and find inspiration from things that you love or enjoy doing such as music, reading, sports, etc.

Move On

This is the hardest thing to do at times and many people let the past dictate their lives for a very long time. I know how hard it is to move on from a negative environment. It was extremely hard for me to let go of my past but one thing that I did right was surround myself with people who don’t dwell on the negative and have a clear focus of how they can achieve happiness. I’m sure you’ve heard this before, but you are the company you keep.  Instead of being around people who make you feel even worse about yourself, start surrounding yourself with people who want the best for themselves and also for you.

Forgive Yourself

We are all hard on ourselves, that’s just the way it is. I’m critical of myself whenever I sing a new song but remember that it’s okay to be hard on yourself but it’s so important to keep yourself thinking that next time will be better and to continue to try again and again even if you fail. I used to always say to myself, “keep your head up” and that positive reinformcent alone helped me continue to make mistakes and learn from each and every one of them.

When you get in that funk, it’s very easy to start blaming yourself, or others for your problems. It’s very important that despite whatever it is that you’re going through, you forgive both yourself and anyone else you might be blaming. I think that we all tend to be way too hard on ourselves, overanalyzing every situation that might have played out differently if we made a different decision, etc.

I’ve failed myself time and time again, and sometimes I cried and beat myself up and other times I simply forgave myself and it felt so good.

Start a Regular Routine

It’s so easy to fall downwards when nothing is going our way. Feeling down about yourself can seem like the end of the world but just remember that those feelings are temporary. Sometimes it does feel like you start to lose control over everything- this is why in my experience, sticking to your regular routine is crucial. When I went through a tough time in my life, I stopped writing, singing and doing the things that I love for a short period of time. I allowed the negative feelings to overwhelm me and I got lost in a pile of emptiness and pain.  Try keeping yourself busy and continue your daily chores even if you can’t stand the thought of doing something other than feeling miserable. I promise that those times will get easier but it takes will power and a need to be happy.

It’s okay to fall apart sometimes because it feels so good when we find ourselves all over again.

Xoxo, Yvonne K.



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